dear influenza A virus,
we humans don't like you. You infect us and give us disease.
I know, this is not your purpose, it's just accidental.
You want to spread and replicate and evolve, OK, but it would be
best for humans and flu if you would do that asymptotically.
As you usually do it in waterfowl. Well, H5N1 was another
one of your "accidents" ...
Maybe you are not really interested in humans or other
mammals or poultry at all, your main playing ground are wild birds.
So let's make a deal, we help you to spread and evolve and you stop
giving us symptoms, OK ?
You know, we humans are very clever, we can grow food, eat it
and transform it easily into the material that you need to replicate.
In great masses. We can easily produce zillions of your kind this way
with little cost. If only you don't disturb us with infectikng all these
tissues and cells and giving us symptoms.
Most of these cell-attacks aren't really needed to spread, right ?
So please stop infecting them, while we would stop to attack
you with immunity and vaccines and antivirals.
And help you to travel the continents so you can mutate and reassort
all you want. As long as you don't make us sick or kill our birds.
See rhinovirus as an example. It infects us even more often than you do.
It did evolve into many different strains
It spreads respiratory as you. It still causes symptoms, but not so much.
This can still be improved ...
Ideally we would create some cells just for you, useless for us,
where you can replicate and spread.
We hope, that you will communicate with our immune system and alert us
when other evil pathogens enter to compete with your replicate-cells
and cause us symptoms and disease.
Just to our both benefit. And there's really no need to invite pneumonia,
that doesn't serve any of us.
So, do we have a deal ?
Well, I know, you won't read this, you are too stupid to read.
Most experts even think that you are not living at all.